We all speak English here, right?

This story was nominated "best e-mail of 1997".  A  telephonic exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East  Economic Review.....

Room Service: Morny. Ruin sorbees

Guest: Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service

RS: Rye..Ruin sorbees..morny! Djewish to odor sunteen?? 

G: Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs

RS: Ow July den?

G: What??

RS: Ow July den?...pry,boy, pooch?

G: Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please.

RS: Ow July dee bayhcem...crease?

G: Crisp will be fine

RS: Hokay. An San tos?

G: What?

RS: San tos. July San tos?

G: I don't think so

RS: No? Judo one toes??

G: I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo one toes' means.

RS: Toes! toes!...why djew Don Juan toes? Ow bow singlish mopping we bother?

G: English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine.

RS: We bother?

G: No..just put the bother on the side.

RS: Wad?

G: I mean butter...just put it on the side.

RS: Copy?

G: Sorry?

RS: Copy...tea...mill?

G: Yes. Coffee please, and that's all.

RS: One Minnie. Ass ruin torino fee, strangle ache, crease baychem, tossy singlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy....rye??

G: Whatever you say

RS: Tendjewberrymud

G: You're welcome